*Originally written & emailed 12/13/2012
Upon waking this morning, I found myself taking time to reflect on mornings with Mimsy. The sounds, the routine, getting started for the day and it got me thinking about what I will miss and why.
Her vibrant energy filled the house as soon as she woke, ready for the newness of the day. She was enthusiastic about everything and lived with curiosity and exclamation points!!! Food! Yes!!! Outside! Yes!!! Smells! Yes!!! Another dog! Yes!!! A walk! Yes!!! A ride in the car! Yes!!! You’re home! Yes!!! Someone’s at the door! Yes!!! Lying on the couch cuddling! Of course YES!!! She had a voracious appetite for everything and approached it all without excuses and without fear.
So during my brief moment of tears this morning came some clarity as to why I will miss her. Of course I will miss touching her, seeing her, feeling her energy, interacting with her, laughing with her…that’s a given. What I will miss goes deeper and applies to more than my relationship with her, but to all my relationships past, present and future.
When Mimsy arrived, life was tough for me and taking care of her was fulfilling when I had trouble taking care of myself. Every day was filled with hope, promise, inspiration, adventure, and we kept moving forward and healing together. I often wondered why I was blessed to have this amazing being come into my life…today I understand more.
As I take a closer look and am honest with myself, I see that many of my tears have not been about her, but more about ME. This tiny dog made me feel strong, courageous, brave, smart, loving, kind, tolerant, supportive, excited, happy, funny, curious, adventurous, and so much more. Just because she has moved on does not mean I lose the ability to FEEL and BE all of those things, she was here to show me I had the ability to FEEL and BE all of that and more all along…she just helped me express it and bring it alive. This must be why God gives us animals…so we have a witness when we relax and allow the purity and TRUTH of ourselves to shine through and KNOW unconditional LOVE for BEing who WE ARE.
As I reflect on what she has shown ME about ME, I find myself reflecting on all the animals, people, places, and experiences that have come into my life to show me more of who I AM, can BE and AM BEcoming. My tears have been about recognizing myself and choosing to acknowledge those parts of ME ready to come ALIVE! Gratitude and appreciation to all animals, people, places, and experiences that helped me find myself along the way and for those yet to come.
So this morning (and everyday) I realize I have a choice to recognize what this beautiful being brought out in ME and LIVE in and with that energy, excitement and exclamation points moving forward! I realize WE are ONE, WE are connected, and what she inspired in me has always been there, she was the key to activating it. I AM Grateful for allowing myself to savor each moment in our last weeks together and feel all the emotions our experiences brought forth and will continue to feel this to completion. I AM especially feeling much Gratitude and appreciation for Mimsy and her gift to me and only hope I can Live up to and BE as amazing, joy-FULL, enthusiastic, zesty and SHINE as she.
Time to start living with exclamation points!!!
“Oh my God…wait and see…what will soon Become of ME” ~Dave Matthews Band